not gonna lie. when i was a kid, i thought the hulk was the coolest. part way, for sure, because it was easy to think that my dad was totally like the hulk-- big and blonde and rough and tumble cool. even when i see old videos of the hulk, it is automatic that i feel this welling pride this sense of nostalgia for what being American meant to me when i was small. i wanted to be a super american. a super girl scout super gymnast super cheerleader and track star. a super kid born and raised.
i mean, there's photos of me posing in from of a patriotic themed christmas tree when i was nine years old, with a brownie girl scout sash full of patches, all blonde hair and big smiles. and BORN IN THE USA is still my favorite album of all time and nothing makes my heart jive like springsteen in tight jeans and a red bandanna,
but i am sure that is partially creeping nostalgia for what i want being american to feel like again.
i really miss the heart.